I AM SOMEBODY!

Man, I feel important.

Since Sunday, I have been called by Hillary twice, Barack once, Bill C. once and Chelsea C. once.

I realize that now all political people are stuck up. They wouldn't even answer my questions. I tried to be nice to them, but they wouldn't listen.

Makeovers....

The little one looks at me yesterday while holding one of her dolls and says "she needs a makeover."

Right then it hits me how our television watching has changed. TLC, HGTV, A&E, Discovery, and the Food Network are our only safe havens. Gone is any semblance of violence or sex.....Darn. Maybe, we ought to shoot the tv all together, we only watch it from 8-10 at night on most days anyway. Of course, I tell my wife we watch The View everyday.

I am interested in one thing about the doll makeover --- What will she do with the molded plastic hair?

I am Ironman.......

Taxes, homework, deadlines, lining up gigs, potty training.... I hate when real life gets in the way of fun. I haven't blogged for a month. Kept meaning to, just didn't. No excuses (other than the ones listed above).

I love superheroes. Mostly movies and an occasional cartoon. Don't read the comic books anymore since they don't cost 25 cents. I am pumped about Ironman. Been singing the Ozzy song and cheering for the trailer when it rolls on tv.

Kid conversation in the car Thursday.

"Does Ironman sew?", said my three year old.

"What," said Mr. Clueless.

"Does Ironman sew? she repeated.

"Honey, I don't understand what you are asking," says Professor Potty (me).

"Does he sew or just iron?", said Super Pee-Pee Girl.

I almost wrecked the car in my laughter. She wanted to know what I was laughing at. I told her I just remembered a funny joke. I can't bear the thought of laughing at her. That shouldn't bother me, since some day she will be laughing at my dress socks with sneakers. Or my tube socks with the colored hula hoops around the top. Or my.........

We are different.....

Our little star says "But Mommy lets me."

I reply sarcastically, "Do I look like Mommy?"

She says, "No, she has long hair."

I am glad she noticed. Being follically challenged, I am glad she gave me some credit. She could have said "No, she has hair."

The Education of a Three Year Old

She was ready to get up from dinner. I knew this because she yelled "I am ready to get up" as Mommy and I talked about the day at the table.

I sternly told her "you need to learn patience." Her answer gives me hope......

She said "I'll learn on Monday."

WooHoo, only three more days till she learns patience.

Super Science Thursday- Beer Streamers

Super Science Thursday- odd ramblings on science topics. A new topic appears every Thursday (that's why it's called SS Thursday)

Where do beer streamers come from?
Beer is a lovely liquid that gives many men the ability to dance, or at least try. Beer also offers several lessons in science. Pour beer into a glass and watch the bubbles form. The bubbles will form beer streamers, tiny rising rivers of bubbles that will originate from a few points inside the glass. Their mesmerizing dance as they rise to the surface captures our attention. What causes them and why do they rise?
The bubbles are formed when carbon dioxide molecules begin to form invisible microbubbles at imperfections on the inside wall of the glass, or possibly at dirt particles inside the glass. Once enough of these microbubbles join forces, they will begin their hypnotic rise to the surface. These imperfections are in the glass are called nucleation points. The bubbles actually grow in size as they rise since the pressure from the liquid decreases. And of course, the bubbles rise because they are gas, which is less dense than the liquid. The same observation can be seen in champagne and clear sodas. The formation of these bubbles is similar to clouds forming by water vapor condensing around dust particles.
An interesting note, beer bubbles rise slower than champagne bubbles. This was first studied by Leonardo DaVinci in the 1600’s as he studied bubbles rising in various liquids. The streams of bubbles will cease when the beer becomes flat. The study of beer bubbles would be a perfectly reasonable graduate school topic. I mean if DaVinci could get away with it, we ought to be able to. You could even get a PhD in Physics someday by studying rising beer bubbles. You can even see a rarer phenomenon, falling bubbles of beer, if you drink enough……

Another candle.......

A year older as of yesterday for me. Too many candles to be safely lit except in the parking lot of a fire department. Even then they would need a pump truck at the ready. The problem is that I don't feel old and have to do simple math to calculate my age.

As you age your ideas of fun change.
A raucous party, no.
Too many beers and a pounding head, no.
Full contact mixed martial arts with the boys, no.
Three hours of loving, touching, squeezing, no.

Birthday at my age........
A family trip to Horton Hears a Who. The advantage to being my age and watching the movie is I know all the words to 'I can't fight that feeling.'

Movie question.....
Who has a bladder large enough to hold an entire 300 ounce large soda? Are 300 ounce sodas part of a sinister movie plot to get you to see the movie twice. I just know that I am going to have to pee at the crucial plot twist.